Peer Support Bereavement Groups

 WHAT: Peer support grief groups for ages 5 years to 18 years and adult caregiver group.  Peer support is different from therapy.  Because we work within peer groups, we count on a common set of developmental abilities: the ability to support one another; take responsibility of own feelings, offer insight (with help), have empathy (communicate with peers).  This is a volunteer program.  People are not specially trained in special needs (mental or behavioral health).  They are facilitating peers of equal abilities.

• Peer support groups are facilitated by fellow human beings.  They have had some training and experience, and their job is to focus on the group; but they are equals of the members.  Therapy groups are facilitated by professionals.

• Peer support groups’ goal is to help members cope through a difficult time.  Therapy groups’ goal is behavior change.

WHEN: 2^nd and 4^th Tuesday of every month

 

WHERE: Kaleidoscope Grief Center office

 

WHY: To serve critically ill and grieving children, teens, and their families through their life changing journey by providing a comprehensive, multifaceted approach of care specialized for children, teens, and their families.  To provide a place for the safe expression of feelings as children, teens, and adults process their own grief leading to empowerment and emotional well-being.

 

WHO: Paired, trained volunteer facilitators leading groups grieving children, teens, and adults separated according to age. 

 

ROLES

 

Participants: children, teen, and adults who attend groups

 

Facilitators: trained volunteers who, in pairs, facilitate the peer support groups

 

Helpers: additional trained volunteers who helps with set-up, greets families as they arrive, gets snacks ready, sees families off, also available as a “sub” in case a volunteer is unable to come to group.

 

Family Coordinator* (FC): a staff person of the agency who is solely responsible for communication, intakes, and follow-up with families

 

Team Coordinator(s)*  (TC): clinical staff person(s) from the agency that is present on each group night in supervisory role over facilitators, not present in peer support groups except in extreme cases of needing a substitute.

 

*The Family Coordinator may or may not also be a Team Coordinator depending on agency staffing

 

 Primary Roles of facilitators are to create and maintain physical and emotional safety:

 Physical Safety is promoted by the closed circle of chairs or pillows, closing the door, having freedom from outside noise/distraction, and privacy.  Clear rules/boundaries on personal space of each group member.

Emotional Safety is promoted by:

• Beginning and ending on time

• Having time and space for emotional expression, including silence

• Having freedom from judgment

• Clear rules/boundaries about participation or passing and confidentiality

Philosophy and Approach:

The support model emphasizes the individual’s innate capacity to seek and find resolution to life’s sometimes painful reality.  There is no set goal.  This model utilizes sharing one’s experience; trust in the individual’s unique process of adjustment and growth.  It requires the skills of compassion, acceptance, trust, unconditional love, and respect.  Active listening and self-disclosure are the modes of being present and companioning the bereaved.

 

GENERAL POLICIES

Waiting List

Only new families are placed on a waiting list in cases where there is not room for the entire family on a night.  Priority will be given to placing the children in groups first and the adults will be places on a waiting list, if necessary.

 

Joining Groups

Anyone wishing to join a group needs to first go through the intake process.  If a family member who had not completed an intake later decides they would like to participate, they need to contact the Family Coordinator so that an intake can be set up.  No one ever goes into a group without completing an intake.

 

Absences

Families should be reminded from time to time of the importance of consistent attendance, and to call Kaleidoscope Grief Center when they are unable to attend groups.  If they are absent for three consecutive weeks, they will be contacted by the Family Coordinator to make a decision about returning to group.

 

Leaving the Group

If, after three weeks, a family is unable to make a commitment, it will need to be explained that we can no longer continue to hold the space.  They will be encouraged to return to say goodbye to their groups.  If they choose to do so, a date for the goodbye should be decided at the time of the call or they can call 24 hours in advance to let us know they plan to come for a goodbye.  The group may be extra full that night if the space has already been allocated to a new group member.  Families are asked to give notice at least one session prior to leaving groups.  If parents are unsure as to whether their children are ready to leave the groups, they can talk with the Family Coordinator who will check in with the children’s facilitators for their input. At the time of this discussion, parents should be advised that when they children leave the groups, the services for the adults end as well.  We do allow some time for the adult to prepare themselves to leave, particularly if they are nearing an anniversary or are going through a hard time.  Actual dates can be worked out in consultation with staff and those involved.

 

Leaves of Absence

A leave of absence is generally granted only in case of a medical necessity.  This is a staff decision.  Volunteers should contact their staff person or Joan Gates to discuss this. Families should contact the Family Coordinator.

 

Referral

Families needing a referral to services of any kind outside of Kaleidoscope Grief Center need to contact the Family Coordinator.  No referrals or additional assistance are to be given by the facilitators. 

 

Returning to the Group

If a family has left the group (either said goodbye or removed from the list after several weeks of non-attendance) and now wants to return, they need to go through the Family Coordinator. 

 

Cost

We do not charge a fee.  We invite families to make a tax-deductible donation that they can afford.  The donation is entirely voluntary.  No family is ever denied services because they cannot contribute.  Because Kaleidoscope Grief Center is a non-profit agency, we rely on contributions from families and the community to cover the costs for each participant.  Because we provide support groups and not therapy, insurance policies do not cover our services.  

 

**Above information credited to The Center for Grieving Children in Portland, Maine and the Dougy Center in Portland, OR.